BREAKING NEWS: Visanthe Shiancoe is Shirtless

EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING. WE HAVE AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE:

Visanthe Shianco is shirtless in the most recent edition of the ESPN Magazine (click on the picture to make it bigger, ladies and Berryands). I know, I thought he would have been pant-less, too.

I struggled for a whole minute to try and figure out how to get this image bigger without making myself feel like a homosex with a shirtless dude on my computer for so long, so that's why the text is so small. However, I also get a copy of the magazine and have graciously transcribed the text that you're probably not all the interested in reading anyway:

BODY SHOT:
Visanthe Shiancoe: 31
Minnesota Vikings TE on his chiseled chest

• "My chest is the key to my blocking. I'm only 250 pounds, and I need to block defenders who are 390 pounds, so I have to compensate with strength and power. Incline press is the perfect exercise for me because it mimics what we do on the field from the three-point stance. I live in the weight room; my teammates make fun of me. They'll say things like, 'Put a shirt on!' They never tell a big lineman to put his shirt on, but they'll say it to me because I look good."

And how! I really appreciate that he talks football in this interaction as well. "Ah yes, the incline press. I totally do those too, bro. No, I'm not checking out your pecs. Wait, yes I am." I wonder who is telling him to put a shirt on all the time. I bet it was McKinnie. Now, I bet it's Toby Gerhart. He's probably asking for a shirt to be put on so he can repress some new urges he hasn't felt since Bertrand asked him to bring him soap in the shower.

This comes off the news that Shanko also recently expressed that when the Vikings got down big against the Saints on Sunday, that he felt some teammates cashed in their time card for the day and coasted through the game. I don't know about you, but one thing I respect about Shank is his huge dong. Secondly, is the fact that he's never dogged it on the field. He's been a great player for the Vikings, and so when I heard rumor recently too of him potentially signing back with the team this year, I can get behind that ... er ... approve of that. I like Shanko, and hope he sticks around. What ... Two awesome tight ends in an offense?! What kind of crazy is that?! *HernandezGronkoswkiTomBradyPatriots*

For good measure, here is another picture of Shanko without a shirt and smiling like a creep for some reason. WOOF!

Like PJD on Facebook

Follow PJD on Twitter