As the 2011 Purple Jesus Diaries fantasy football season started this year, I was nervous. Last year, we had a Wisconsin fan win the league, making all of us morons from Minnesota look like a bunch of simpletons who didn't know the first thing about football. This year, I did the unthinkable by expanding the league teams from 10 to 14, while simultaneously allowing a total of THREE Canadians into the league as well. What the hell, douche?! What happens if the winner is from Edmonton, and then you have to ship them a t-shirt you promised the winner with international shipping?! This blog doesn't cover those type of expenses! You're screwed!
From all of us in the PJD league, we can now thank the AMERICAN @mjbtompkins, aka, Wilf's Stache, for fighting back a Wisconsonite who was looking for his second title in a row with a balsam stick. The Red, White, and Blue has been unfurled, your Cheeseback! The bald eagle is back! PJD has a new champion, and his team is named after a Jew! ... Wait ... Is that an OK thing?
Anyway, congrats to Wilf's Stache on the league win, a free t-shirt, and bragging rights for the next year. Now, how did it happen?
Cheeseheads vs. Wilf's Stache: First item on Wilf's Stache's agenda? Blowing Drew Brees until his knees buckle for giving him a fantasy football championship title. Brees dropped a cool 28 points when Wilf needed them most and put to rest any idea of a Cheese come back through Julio Jones. Best of all? He didn't throw to Lance Moore hardly at all, either, whom Cheese had! Genius! Wilf also owes his first daughter to CJ Spiller, aka The Guy Who Sucked Until Last Week, and DeAngelo Williams. He's not even the best running back on that team (
The Medal Winners: The final breakdown leaves the top three teams as such; 1. Wilf's Stache 2. Cheeseheads 3. Parole Models. Parole Models? Yeah, I'm as baffled as you are. I forgot that people were playing for something besides the t-shirt. Do you think Parole knows you don't win anything for getting third place? Maybe an internet high five, at best? As is, Yahoo! offered the tie-breaker in the playoffs to head-to-head match-up in the season, and then just defaults to playoff seeding. They REALLY put a lot of thought into this one. "Eh, just give it to someone, no one cares." And they're right. When Parole wins, no one cares. But if PJD were to win, it would be the biggest f*cking deal in the world, I promise you that. Anyone, congrats to you smug assholes.
On to 2012: As the fantasy year comes to an end, there are several "house keeping" things to address, and undress, like the French maid. RAWR! Whether it's scoring, number of teams, prize, or something else that YOU have a concern about as a team owner in this said league, leave your ramblings that I will likely ignore in the comments! Now, on to MY business in convenient bullet point form:
- Attrition will MOST DEFINITELY occur during the offseason so that this league can get down to a managable number of teams. We already know Ponder's Porn Palace is out, but I'm not sure YET which douche canoe will ignore the invites next year. I anticipate at least three of you leaving, getting us back down to 10. Perfect.
- I desperately want to move the fantasy league from Yahoo! Schports to something like ESPN, but now with two seasons under our belt, there is HISTORY in this league. Ever bothered to look at any of it? It's kind of fun. So we'll probably stay with Yahoo even though it blows.
- Keeper leagues? Set draft order for next year based on final standings? Yay or nay?
- I still like kickers scoring 37 points for your team. I think I heard some people have a period over it. Are there that many objectors or are there mainly people who just don't give a shit? If that's the case, I'm keeping my scoring.
- I am open to new division names for next year. Warcrafts' Weenies? Percy's Joint Jiggas? Literally, anything (not really).
- I promise to keep making t-shirts so the winner's choice becomes even harder to make. WHAT FREE PIECE OF JUNK DO I WANT?!
Anyway, thanks again to everyone who followed, played, won, lost, cried, cheated, and made an unnecessary amount of roster moves. It didn't help you at all, Kenny Britt's Tits. We'll see you all again next year. Wilf's? Email me your mailing info with your t-shirt. If you're half the man that Feisty is (she's a woman ...), you'll send in a picture. SHOTS FIRED.
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<<<<< Wonders if someone (me) will get "Shafted" from joining the league for a 3rd sraight season :/
@the4norsemen Little known fact; Crying about it like a 6 year old isn't going to get you in the league.
Will this be my new theme song??? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDOH3ViMmCM&feature=related
If you started a player injuried or on the bye this year... should not be in the league next year. That would easily fix it. This league has a messed points system but its different so I don't mind it. If we want to do keepers I think we need to start that next season. Once all these shitty teams with good players are gone.
I see some of you saying "Can't wait for next year!" and I'm thinking to myself, "Shoot, I was hoping those people would be a part of the attrition process ..."
#justkidding #maybe #iwantatshirt
I had a lot of fun playing this year, just wish my team didn't blow more than Bertrand. I too would like to see it at 10-12 teams. The talent pool was definitely diluted (I started Colt McCoy one week!) I think the point structure was a little weird, TD's were heavily favored. I think it should be 1 point per 10 yards receiving/rushing and 25 yards passing. 4 pts. per passing TD, 6 per rushing/receiving. I think the points for kickers and defense were good because it made them worthwhile. I would be cool with trying ESPN, I've heard good things about their features. Thanks to PJD for dealing with this league full of fuckups like myself.
Fun times, can't believe it's over already. Hell, I still remember draft night and how excited I was during it (Like the foolish idiot I am.)
10 or 12 teams works for me.
A keeper league would also be sweet. But really, I'm down for whatever.
Personally, I think TD passes should be worth 4 points. 6 is a bit much, and I think you need to keep rushing/receiving TDs more valuable.
Oh yeah, and a true heartfelt CONGRATS to the new red-blooded American Champion! Way to show that cheesedick what's up.
Fun league everyone. Thanks to PJD for setting it up and running it; and y'all that actually participated each week.
@CollegeWolf TD passes were 4 points. It's just that when people play Brees and Rodgers - who score a billion points a week - or Cam Newton who runs TDs in, those rushing ones are worth 6. It's just set as a TD heavy league, but that's just how I've always played.
@PJD Looks like settings had TD Passes 6 points. The default is 4 but it was changed for the league. (Camputer Newton is crying.)