We've been fooled, every last one of us.
Ever since the Vikings drafted "Christian Ponder" and let former Minnesota Vikings starting quarterback, Tarvaris Jackson, walk in free agency to sign with Seattle, we haven't seen any type of improvement in quarterback play. You would think we would, or at the very least that we would notice some type of differences in style, or numbers, or approach to the game, ANYthing. As Vikings fans, we were clamoring to have Tarvaris (or TarVar, as he was always affectionately called around here) run out of town and to bring in the new franchise quarterback. It seemed we had our wish when the Vikings picked Ponder. But we should have seen it coming, we should have seen the signs.
We never got a new quarterback after Brad Childress left. We just got Tarvaris Jackson in White Face.
Vikings blog Daily Norseman brings some compelling evidence to our attention. Take a look at these numbers comparing "Christian Ponder" and TarVar in their starts as quarterback of the Vikings. The results ... May be shocking:
|"Christian Ponder"||Stats||Tarvaris Jackson|
|22||Starts in Minnesota||20|
But this isn't all. We should have seen the other signs too, the more obvious ones. We were expecting a prototypical passer with Christian Ponder, a quarterback who would stand in the pocket and throw the ball down field. But no. We ended up with, oddly enough, a white running quarterback, a "scrambler" if you prefer to use the Caucasian term for running quarterback, very similar to TarVar's style. And the number of times both of these "different quarterbacks" have run into or banged knees with Adrian Peterson? Too numerous to count. There is simply no way there could be TWO separately people on this earth dumb enough to do that. And the number seven jersey. It was so obvious. "Ponder" couldn't even pretend he was trying to be double the quarterback he was as TarVar by picking 14 or something. Instead, he remained the status quo and drove this team to the ground while wearing the same, cursed, number.
He's like Batman. TarVar is like Batman for the Vikings, but an evil one. Not one that protects fans from failures and harm, but one who inflicts it. It's the only answer. Have you ever seen "Ponder" and TarVar in the same place together? Of course not, because it hasn't happened. It will never happen. He has to spend too much time in the chair to apply his White Face to pass as "Christian Ponder," young, franchise quarterback of the Vikings. But it won't work, Pondaris Jackson, we're on to you. We've seen how you both like to take your shirts off. That was the first giveaway. The interceptions and poor play was just the final straw.
But we've learned our lesson. We kicked you to the curb and your alter ego is next, buddy, no doubt. So don't expect to see a number seven jersey on the field next year. We won't allow it. And wipe that White Face off, you look ridiculous.
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I saw your pix of shirtless Ponder and thought of...Kyle Boller. I swear they could be brothers. Are you sure you picked the right picture?
Perhaps there's comfort in seeing Ponder as a better Boller. In his first two years (27 starts), Boller
had 3779 passing yards
threw 20 passing TDs
threw 20 INTs
completed 54.4% of his passes
had a combined QBR of 67.8
TarVar and Boller managed to get their coaches fired. Ponder hasn't done that. Now, don't you feel better?
@knollmcb Just kidding... maybe?
@knollmcb Boooo spammer BOOOOO.
@CollegeWolf Pondaris Jackson might be this blog's greatest contribution to society.
@CollegeWolf Oh god, I've never even considered that possibility.
@SkinsHogHeaven The season isn't over for Big Leslie to get fired yet, and god I hate Kyle Boller. How is this supposed to make me feel any better?!
@PJD You must find joy in small things. Smell the roses and all. Ponder is better than Boller. There's something in that.
My team has no QB issues, but believe men when I say I've lived your pain.
@knollmcb He's just being himself. An asshole. :-D He drops links in comment boxes all the time. Thanks for sharing.
@SkinsHogHeaven Yeah, I think you've pretty much nailed the exact problem!
@PJD You don't really have a choice on Ponder. You've won too much to get Matt Barkley or Landry Jones. Neither are strong enough to trade up to get. Any new QB is a reset to 0 whether to keep Musgrave or boot him.. 'Tis a quandry.
Musgrave is highly regarded and did wonders with Jason Campbell and Michael Vick. Wait. That's not helpful is it.
@SkinsHogHeaven Well yeah, my biggest fear is that the Vikings would look at their roster, see the 13 different holes they need fixed, and trade that RG3 pick away anyway. Trading 3 1st rounders is a tough pill to swallow, regardless of who you get. Will you need those to build a better team around RG3 in the coming years?
Maybe the jury is still out on Ponder right now, but not for long. No one is a huge fan of Bill Musgrave, I don't think, so I would be interested in seeing what another position coach could do with him, but do we have the time (2-3 years?) to allow another guy to bring Ponder up in his system? I don't think so. Regardless, there are some coaches who need to lose their job in Minnesota, irrespective of what the players are actually doing.
@PJD So it's MY fault my teams defense allowed a back-up to rush for 109 yards in a half for the win? Oh. Wait. It is my fault. Sorry 'bout that.
You bring up point of how life takes strange turns. If Vikings "won" by losing that game to improve to second pick, would they really have selected RGIII over Kalil? I mean, who knew? Would they have accepted a shirtload of Draft picks to move into their spot. I'm not sure about that either. We know the Rams would have.
Little known fact. SHH is a former long-time Twin Cities resident who's pulling for your uff-da team and its fans.
As for AP, I watched MSU Spartans tank even with a strong rusher and mean defense. It's not how games are won these days. Coincidental injuries at FedEx Field didn't hurt you last year, and AP can't help you enough this year. Get over it.
As for Ponder, I'd take a long hard look at the position coach instead of the player. Maybe Jim Zorn can help.
@Hammy1724 Everything above is true.
Sorry SHH, I appreciate that you can sympathize with the fact that your team has had a shitty QB or two over the years, but Rings > Almosts. And almosts are all we have. You had Theisman, Doug Williams, Mark Rypien, and now RGIII. We had Tarkenton (and by default, Kathy Lee Crosby), Culpepper and a fuckload of one year wonders from other teams (Cunningham, Moon, Favre, Frerotte ((don't laugh, he was 10-3 as Vikes starting QB))) I'm pretty sure Theisman's wrong-way leg is a better QB than Ponder.
@SkinsHogHeaven I'm still mad at your team for tearing Peterson's leg up, concussing Ponder, which brought in Joe Webb, who led us to a victory over you in 2011, which dropped us one spot in the draft, which allowed you to jump us and draft RG3 this year. Life sure is funny!